Beatriz Alemar

Inaction.

What happens when you are overwhelmed with choices and shut down. Because making a decision and opening one of the many closed doors is scary.  Because picking one means good or bad the ideas behind the other doors end.  You can’t reverse a decision.

So, we procrastinate.  We turn towards indecision and inaction as our comforts.  It’s easier.  So much easier than making a decision.  So much easier than acting.  But, in the end, such a sad, lonely place as your life waits for you to make up your mind.

Goodbye, Inaction.  You won’t be missed.

Hello, Action - treat me kindly.  I’m reaching towards the handle…

1. I am a marketer and connector.
2. I have a fulfilling career doing the things I love.
3. I am surrounded by friends that motivate and inspire me.
4. I am 115.
5. I am a swimmer; swimming gives me peace and perspective.
6. I have a second income doing something I love.
7. I travel and experience new things, places and people.
8. I am open to friendships and romance.
9. I am a blogger that creates meaningful content about topics I enjoy.
10. I am an active leader in my community
11. I establish beneficial and meaningful relationships with others in my field.
12. I am an active student of social media, personal branding and marketing and love to share my knowledge with others.
13. I have plenty of time to complete my responsibilities and enjoy life.
14. I am living a healthy lifestyle with a new appreciation for food.
15. I willingly embrace change and forgive myself for failures.

The thought of failure terrifies me.  All my life I have been taught to be the best - the first time around.  There is no try - just doing.  And, it better freaking be the best otherwise all your effort is wasted.

Most of that pressure comes from me internally.  I conjure these ideas that everyone else around me will judge me, think less of me and not like me if I don’t win.  It probably stems from some psychological need for attention and praise.  Don’t know.  Whatever it is - my ridiculous quest for perfection has caused me to restrict myself and not enjoy the little moments.  Every new task feels like a test.  I get that same tense, no nonsense, slightly panicky feeling when trying out new things as I do when taking a major life changing test.  The little things are hard to enjoy when you’re wound up like that.

To avoid that horrible feeling of defeat and self-loathing (I really, really DON’T take failure well), I’ve learned to play it safe and only risk myself when I have a good shot of winning or doing well.  It’s lead to a superficially successful and somewhat unextraordinary life. I’ve realized by being afraid of failure - I’m failing at something far more consequential than all of my fears put together.  I’m failing at enjoying life to its fullest.

In that vein, I will strive to take risks and shoo away those crippling fears.  I’ll stop holding back.  I’ll get out of my comfort zone.  And, I will forgive myself if I fail.

Because, not trying is the biggest failure of all.